in the name of zero

sad day today. i wasn’t able to watch desperate housewives. i’m so sad, infact, i think i won’t say much…

/* reckless memory allocations
 * of patience, temper and frustration.
 * no garbage collecting too..
 */
#ifdef DICKHEADS_WATCHING_JUSTICE_LEAGUE
	while (1) {
		long double *fuck_shit;
		fuck_shit = (long double *) malloc (sizeof (long double));
	}
#endif
#ifndef DICKHEADS_WATCHING_JUSTICE_LEAGUE
	#define WATCHED_DESPERATE_HOUSEWIVES
#endif
	
#ifdef WATCHED_DESPERATE_HOUSEWIVES
	printf (”bragging rights for the week secured!\n”);
	printf (”post productive blog entry rather than this dipshit!\n”);
	exit (0); /* graceful exit */
#endif

p.s. i’ll go jump off a cliff now…

my dad talking on the phone (in english) is a family pet peeve. annoys the hell outta my mom real quick. i would follow soon after… then a couple of minutes later, my brother.

school rules are getting stricter and stricter each passing day. feels more like a penitentiary now rather than a university. apparently, the tuition has increased so much that fashion is now an offense punishable by non admitance and harrasment. what’s next? use only colgate as toothpaste? urinating is forbidden at 5 o clock?

maybe that hype about giving quality education and being a university isn’t such a good thing afterall.

i miss my old blogspot posts. good old blogger days. profanity has grown since then. i wonder if the “old” readers visit my new blog. it recently came to my attention that majority of the people want something more emotional, heartfelt so to speak. entries talking about real problems, not just complaints from being a sore life loser. topics that has something to do with aspiration, personal opinion, no politics, just juicy heartache drama, soap opera stuffs.

prept and ready
after lots of rain checks, i’m finally updating my box.

1) sync’ed last night to update my box’s gentoo portage.
2) tonight, i’ll merge gentoo-sources-2.6.12-r6 for my new kernel. 2.6.10-SteffyLove (ck) served me well. i compile kernels on an alternate basis between ck-sources and gentoo-sources.
3) updating from bootsplash to the newer (easier) gensplash.
4) updating from devfs to the newer (easier) udev.
5) merged eix. unmerged esearch.
6) i’m guessin’ nvidia-kernel will give me problems…
7) general system package updates .. (firefox, conky, gtk-gnutella.. )
8) lots of reading in between too. alsa guide, udev rules. planet gentoo, planet debian, planet fedora.

gonna be a bumpy road ahead.

let’s take it from the top shall we?

omfg! i woke up this morning to a “still” stiff neck which looks like it won’t be healing anytime soon. my room’s cold. my bed sucks. my pillows, hard. my blanket’s thin. i’m sleeping like a freakin’ cave man for pete’s sake!

omfg! the town drunkards have been hanging out more and more at the new “tuba” store near our house. shit. for the unsavvy, “tuba” is a poor man’s wine. in my own words, coconut vinegar that is still not fermented…. (so technically, it’s not vinegar) but i dont know. smells awful too.

omfg! i have an integral calculus test tommorrow and i don’t know anything about the lesson. it’s actually pointless to talk about this honestly, coz i’ll flunk no matter what but then i’m trying to do a preliminary kind of self acceptance here. i’ll spare you the suspense and just illustrate it in terms you’d understand. trying to pass this subject is like trying to remove chewing gum stuck in your hair. it’s hopeless. the more you strive to remove it, the more it gets stuck. in the end, not only will you be tired but you’ll also be having a very very bad hair day. very bad in fact, the only thing left for you to do is to cut your hair in blind, frustrated rage. happened to me once… moving on …

miss burns. i’m soo in love with this girl. amen.

omfg! i’m load-less. nights are incomplete when i don’t greet miss burns goodnight.

omfg! miss pamela knows my name! i was going up the lrc stairs , minding my own business when i heard her call out to me in the sweet girly holler that was her voice. i approached her, said yes and asked her that same question. i got a no but she said that our stat teacher won’t be going to class tonight. she was with a guy, so i made a quick cute salute, said bye and left. i’ll try working on my exit, coz i pretty much left an impression on her that i was shy or worse, scared.

i’d like to end with a quote by william shakespeare.

three days of stiff neck and i’m still not recovering. dammit. i’ve been on a coding stump for several weeks already and according to the tao of programming, everything begins to become void. supposedly, i was to learn libtoolize integration with gnu autotools but i keep on getting sidetracked into windows to play warcraft.

speaking of which, we fucking lost again! 6 straight warcraft losses friday night. but this time, we lasted longer than usual. it’s good sign that we’re slowly improving, though not that good coz we still lost. our opponents really take the game sersiously. i mean, how can you beat a guy who studies the math behind warcraft (everything from armor reduction percentages, attack gain bonuses on each armor type, magic buffs and nerfs) and a guy who lost his girl for the game? (and two other guys that are eqaully passionate) i can only admire their zealotry. and i wish i shared in that same love for the game. unfortunately, i have a second life which i also take seriously. things don’t exactly turn out the way i want coz i always get dumped. i’m a hearthrob in cyberspace though but that’s just trash talking

cheating-wife-sex-with-hunky-gardener-coz-her-husband’s-a-dick
oh yeah! it keeps getting better and better. and this time, gabrielle’s husband nearly caught them making out while taking a shower. close call. she decided that it was time to take the banging some place else so she went to the gardener’s house to have a little chat. i really thought it was over but then the problem took care of itself. as it turned out, (by some sudden touch of scripting genius, which was, by the way, a very mean thing to do to an avid viewer of the show!!) it happened. instant sexual gratification, minus the fear of her husband finding out. he, the gardener, gave her a rose as a sign that he seriously cares for her now, which is actually a good thing so to speak, (in a professional, friendly, kind of way), but then my mind disses the whole idea of her being an infidel, (in a religious, girlfirend-less guy, kind of way) coz it’s downright nasty. erotically whacked, but nevertheless, nasty. as long as the sex is good, go and bang him baby!

anyway, let me take this brief, nipple hardening moment of ecstacy to talk about relationships and what it means to a girl. from my point of view of course. they just love the drama! boys love drama too, but we like to skip that part in favor of scenes that actually make our heart thump instead of making it weak with an overflow of worthless, pathetic, self-inflicted bullshit. erection takes place in mere seconds and trust me my lady friends, it goes away as fast as it comes in. though i’d hafta point out that we boys can compromise several minutes of wasted erection (which is a total drag honestly seapking) just to make girls feel that sex is special and meaningful and that we’re gentle, and caring, and we love them very much. and the list goes on.

relationships are like chess. and for some reason, i feel that boys always have the tendency to play as pawns. it’s a bit of an overkill but that is the truth. and we know very well, that the man has to be in control. we have to be in control goddamit!, coz if “she” is, we’ll be eaten away by other pawns. i’ve been a pawn one too many times but this time, i’m striving to be a king, though, with a “pawnish” characteristic. in the game of chess, everyone tries to protect their king, even the queen. i’ll love all the attention.

well, that’s it. there’s something about mary is showing at channel star movies and my brother’s watchin’. i think i’ll go join him now.

blogging lesson number one. sex sells.

so why this post? coz i just suck at courtship and i desperately need to go to the toilet to urinate. i’ve been holding it for about an hour and a half already. it’s my brother’s birthday today (20 years) and his friends came over to hang out and have dinner. nothing fancy. just a humble preparation by my mom. two items on the menu, excluding rice and drinks. as far as i’m concerned, they’re really noisy out there. apparently satisfied. he’ll never read this entry but hey!, happy brithday younger brother.

i feel like a new guy after every discharge. you know, kinda like the enlightenment buddha had some years ago while pondering on the sick, sad, sorry state of the world and how hopeless things are. anyway, onto more relevant issues.

i dont unzip my fly open, i just loosen my belt and bring my pants down a little on the front. exposing my glory to the urinal, just enuff for it to do it’s job cleanly without wetting any fabric. i hold my hotrod in the most gentle, soft kind of way coz it’s a very delicate thing and i wouldn’t wanna damage it beyond repair, or jerk and shock it or anything. …like how you would hold a girl’s hand when you two are out on a date… only much much softer. when i urinate, i usually point the tip to just about any direction i could think of as long as i could wash it away afterwards. (usually, in a circular fashion) similar to how a gardener sprinkles water on his plants on the garden. i don’t know about other guys but i usually shake my hose a maximum of two times only. this whole routine is a form of zen. the “one with the universe” thing.

i was able to catch desperate housewives today on channel starworld and i kinda like the show. i wish they aired a marathon of it instead of just one. i really look forward to the cheating-wife-sex-with-hunky-gardener-coz-her-husband’s-a-dick love scenes .. i guess they’ll be showing more of that in suceeding episodes so until i’m satisfied, i’ll be keeping my sundays free so i can watch the show.

gee. talking about my wee wee and sexy, hot, curvacious, american, blonde, single-looking married women makes my nipples harden! i better stray away from the topic before i think of something more obscene.

ok. so i stayed in my room for the entire day doing nothing but play warcraft coz i disguised gaming as scientific research. my mom and dad knew better than to disturb their hard studying son in his room. i downloaded some warcraft battle replays hoping i could pick some styles up but i only picked up one thing - i suck as a gamer. the guys who played make it look easy.

… more practice in order …

i went to the library the other day for an official first time purpose of studying, this semester. it’s our first long test in math (integral calculus which included rectilinear antidifferentiation) and like everyone else out there, i suck at numbers. two to three seats away from me, there was a cute chinese “freshgirl” reading a book. she was alone, apparently, a transferee. either that or she’s just anti social. but anyway, enuff with assumptions here comes my rant:

her cuteness distracted me from studying. needless to say, i flunked my test (for sure). coz i only answered about 6 in a ten item test and half of those where just doodles of math symbols and numbers.

we’re studying compilers at my computer science class. specifically, syntactical/semantic analysis and the steps involved when compiling a program. it really is hard to compile a program on a 1 megahertz brain.

on the social front,

i was able to muster enough courage to pinch miss pamela’s elbow this afternoon while saying ‘hi’. our first real “physical connection”. perhaps i’ll try patting her shoulder next time we meet.

hanging out at the “salt” office feels like heaven and hell at the same time. quite funky but i’m getting used to the feeling since i stayed there twice already. (but only on carefree afternoons)

for many nights now, i only dream of one thing. that i’m a pizza delivery boy bringing orders to ms burns’ house.

good fucking luck to me!

everybody wants to get into the act. amazing, how a piece of illegally obtained tape would spark nationwide controversy and uprising. public interest superceding privacy is a sick, sick ideology.

1) there they go again. going out on the streets to rally like hell does not show unity. it’s not democracy at work. raising someone on the pedestal to be a leader only to shoot him/her down is a great symbolic gesture that we love cnn and fox news.

2) susan roces. lonely widow sentiments have no place in politics. the greatest cnn and fox news lover i think.

3) i’ve heard the tape. it’s a “no brainer”, trying to protect votes is not cheating. lots of cnn and fox news lovers in the senate and congress too!

4) first gentleman mike a. a self imposed exile? jesus! stop using the people’s money to take vacations damn you! wrong move asshole. you’re not only, in essence running away from responsibilities, you are also making things harder for your wife by creating an avenue for skeptics to exercise their imagination. you like cnn and fox news too don’t you?

good fucking luck to the philippines.

oh well, pratice makes perfect.